My Unpopular Opinion

Unpopular opinion below, read about it and my reasoning behind it if you care or if you dare. 

I don't want to be taken care of, I want to be supported. 

Yep, there I said it. And I'll say it again, I don't want to be taken care of, I want to be supported. 

I hear so many people, girls in particular saying they can't wait to meet that one special man and get married so they can be taken care of the rest of their lives. *shutters* Being the strong, independent woman that I am, that just makes my skin crawl. Now I don't say this in a condescending tone, if a girl wants a man to take care of her, good for her! That is her choice to create the life she desires. But for me, I speak from experience, I know that a relationship structured on the principle of the man "taking care of me" just won't work. Now this isn't me saying that when I'm sick and down for the count that I don't want a little extra TLC, because I mean come on, we all appreciate the extra love and attention on the occasion. What I'm getting at is, I have big dreams and big aspirations. I have big goals and plans. I have a big heart and I have the desire to share all of the above with the right person. But I am not going to give those all up because someone doesn't appreciate my drive or feels superior to me simply because maybe my dreams don't line up with what a "woman should be dreaming about". No matter how cute, handy, sweet talkin', or *fill in your desired traits for a man* he is. And quite frankly I don't think I should have to. I'm all about compromise and I fully understand that relationships are all about both give and take, however I refuse to lose myself because of someone else's inability to see my worth. 

Picture courtesy of Kacie Fleeman Photography © 
Y'all go look her up!

I was raised by strong parents that taught me to work hard and instilled in me the confidence to chase my dreams because I am able to achieve the goals I have set before myself. I was held to a very high standard growing up where a lot was (still is) expected of me. I was expected (and enjoyed) to work right alongside the men, not behind them. I was challenged and pushed to be just as good if not better than all the men and women alike, that I was surrounded by in all aspects of my life; simply because I should always want to be the very best I could be. My independence was cultivated starting at a young age and I am so thankful my parents continued to nourish it and challenge me to do things on my own. Even when all I wanted was to sit back and let someone else do the hard work, they supported and encouraged me to do it myself because they knew I was capable. And for that I will be forever thankful. Because not only do I appreciate the value of hard work and getting the job done no matter how difficult, but I know the rewarding feeling of reaping the benefits of accomplishing things on my own. I am able to confidently, yet humbly be proud of myself. And if you ask me, everyone should love themselves and be proud of themselves, but that's a whole other topic I'll save for another day.

So in case you didn't already catch on, to this: I am fiercely independent and damn proud of it. I believe I am a capable person. But, that doesn't mean I want to end up alone forever living as the crazy cat (well, cow in my case) lady. I may pretend to have a heart of stone, and while I may have a stone wall around it, I actually have a really big, soft, kind heart. I fully believe it is in fact possible to be both a badass and a sweetheart; and to be honest, that is how I strive for people to see me and think of me. That is how I hope to present myself. And that's how I hope my future husband sees me, especially. I want him to pursue his dreams and achieve his goals and I want to be there supporting him every step of the way. Just as he supports me on my path of achieving and succeeding. I desire to be supported, not taken care of. I can take care of myself and I know I can, because I'm doing it everyday. But no person, no matter how strong or independent can go without support. And when people have relationships, romantic or not, founded on mutual support, think of all they can achieve TOGETHER! And isn't that what our lives should be all about?! Selflessly loving and supporting one another just as Christ loves us. 

So all that to say, it may be an unpopular opinion in today's world, but I'm holding out for the man that wants to support me, not take care of me. The man that has dreams and ambitions where I can have the honor of supporting him. The man who wants to chase dreams, our dreams together, loving and supporting (and occasionally making fun of) each other along the way. The man who is proud of his fiercely independent, badass, and sweetheart woman. 

 

            Shout out to Jessica Trenner for these two pictures! She's my awesome and obviously talented cousin ♥

PS. Shoutout to all the badasses in my life, I look up to each and everyone of you and am so blessed by you, whether you realize it or not. Thanks for loving this independent, strong willed gal. ♥